The thought of you sitting beside me and telling me to watch glimpse of my life
I thought you were crazy, but on second thought why should you have all the fun
Digging deeper into my thoughts and past, I can’t help but remember
this lost child that’s in me, so helpless, lonely and forgotten
this child that yearns only for love and affection
this child that loves everything but not realizing love is easily discarded
A cry for love and affection faded away, in place hatred and torture take its place
The sight of me, sends chill down my spine of the what ifs,
what if my mother held me every minute and kissing me always
what if my father wasn’t a drunk and never had the thought of another drop
what if my siblings had a care inside there hearts of a little sister
what if, those words stay forever in the back of my mind
never to emerge again
I’m not saying I didn’t have a gloomy and happy childhood
I just don’t bother to remember such awful memories
It probably somewhere in the back of my mind, wishing not to show itself
To my head, its better to remember the good stuff
The happy memories, the good moments, the special event
Those memories have more meaning than the stuff that hide in the back of my mind
The farther I dig I begin to realize I actually had a descent childhood,
full of memories, people and events
How could I think otherwise, unless my head made everything up
just to make myself happy.
Mmmhh I wonder, do I really have that childhood I imagine
I won’t really know!