Tonight I sit here crying to myself
Ridden with all these crazy emotions
Going through my head
Sometimes I feel like eating a bullet and maybe the pain will go away
It’s hard to get through the day without
Feeling down in the dumps
I just hate myself everyday that goes by
My head always gets the best of me
I like to believe my fairy tales cause’ there fictional
The times I but on a smile …
When I have to just throw all my feelings out the window and smile
When I don’t wanna show anyone the real me
Hate looking at me in the mirror
or when I have to pretend the life I’m living is peachy
It’s a matter of time before I do something I might not regret
My head is getting lost up inside its self
And I’m beginning to see the crack beneath the skin
When everyone is looking to talk to me, I’d rather turn and runaway
I can’t stand the crowd or all the fake people
It’s just really hard to talk to anyone about the things I have gone through
and hard to bear with a reminder of everything I’m trying to forget,
when it’s just right there in my face
Nothing helps when this awful feeling, its just torturing me.
No one asks for these mental challenges or problems
It just makes me feel happy and sad all at the same time.
Matters of the heart are limited to selfishness
And my head is always spinning
Sometimes I just like to spin around and around
It all stops when I put my feet on the ground.